Special day ruined by a worry heart

First day of school in term three. Met my girls..... Yayyy!!! Haha... How much I missed them! Anyways, I gave the 5A girls (who were present) their gifts from Singapore. There's still some people I need to give it too. For my girlfriends, Nira, Emma and Judy, I gave them a more special gift. I gave them collectibles. I gave Judy a cow(she loves cows. Too bad that there's no pig), Emma a pink teddy and Nira a purplish, pinkish, bluish(etc) butterfly. I'm glad that they all love it! =) As soon as I saw those three out of hundreds collectibles, I knew that it was for them =) I have the panda one, ehe... Anyways, it turns out that I'm not the only one who was giving gifts. Anden also gave. His gifts were from Miri.

Every 5A's received one, I think!

When the school bell rang, telling us that school just ended... He[the crushie] walked slowly towards me. He stopped and stared while I was busy packing. Then, he approached and called my name "Zirah" I looked at him and smiled. He smiled back. He then reached into his pockets, pulled out a small beautiful box and handed it to me. I took it shyly as it was so unexpected! Then, I put it down and gave him his gift. A leather gelang tangan[is it still called as a bracelet?] Anyways, he smiled and took it when I gave it to him. We both left the classroom. When I opened the box, inside it was even more beautiful than the box. It was a flowery, silver bracelet with diamond studs.

Lovely, right?

God, it was such a special gift. Nira was there to witness us exchanging gifts. She probably knows how I felt that time. I couldn't stop smiling.

God, I need your help, I'm a coward right now. I'm afraid to tell the other guy[athlete 808] I don't know how to tell him. My two friends tell me how just easily.Don't they know that its hard to do so? They're not the one who's gonna break someones heart! I am! I don't want him to feel what I've felt after my very first break-up. Maybe he felt it before but I don't want him to feel it again. I know I've broken a lot of hearts in my life already but I know that this one's heart will be even more shattered. He really loves me and has high hopes. We promised to be an item after the O'levels but I don't think I can keep that promise.

God, what am I going to do? Its not my fault for accidentally loving someone more than him. Love is such a crazy and unpredictable thing... Sometimes, I feel like blaming my ex. If he had given our relationship a chance, this would've not happen. Then again, I cant blame him... I still think the reason of our break-up is that he fell for another girl. Why? Cause I think I'm in the same situation but unlike him, I'm giving this relationship a chance. I know that it wont work anyways...

Status: Critically worried

XOXO

Zira Lee